Saturday, July 4, 2015

Well, at least he got to witness gay marriage legalized in the U.S.

As folks post their remembrances and favorite talks of President Boyd K. Packer, I'm really struggling to think of anything positive about the man.

As always, my condolences to the family of a leader who devoted his life to the church, but Packer is the reason I began to distance myself from the LDS faith.

First off, I'm one of the "dangers" he spoke of in this now infamous talk.

Then there's all the talk about my "little factory."

For non-members, in the third paragraph of his official AP obituary, there's already mention of why he wasn't a favorite.

But it wasn't until his 2010 General Conference talk that pushed me into a deep depression of trying to be both gay and Mormon. I heard these words live with about 10 close friends huddled around a TV:
"Some suppose that they were pre-set and cannot overcome what they feel are inborn tendencies toward the impure and unnatural. Not so! Why would our Heavenly Father do that to anyone? Remember he is our father." 
Yes, the talk was edited for the print version, but the damage had already been done. These talks are reviewed and edited by many before they're given over the pulpit, and I never understood how the above paragraph got the final approval.

For many members so devoted to the gospel, the above words and talks just push them even harder to overcome masturbation and homosexual thoughts and actions. And this caused some to be pushed to an even deeper form of depression and self-hate, and yes, I hate to say it - but some were even pushed to suicide. Looking back, I'm glad I wasn't as strong and devoted as some of my peers. Five years after that talk, I don't know where I'd be if I didn't slowly let go from Mormonism.

I'm just glad Packer was able to see gay marriage legalized in all 50 states. He tried so hard to denounce homosexuality, I hope he was able to see at least a few people happy after last Friday's ruling.

I'll leave a Facebook comment left on a Mormon themed news site. It was left by another gay Mormon who put Packer's death in a blunt but appropriate light. (And also inspired me to write this blog post.)
"I wish I could say I was heartbroken; President Packer was a difficult man to love. But I wish him a peaceful rest and his family, solace. 
May his angry and thorough misreadings of God's message of love travel with him to the grave." 


  1. OMG! I remember the 'little factory'! Good memories, hahaha!

  2. This is almost exactly what I posted on my facebook. Not sorry to see him go, he did so much damage to me as a young gay mormon. Forgive me if I fail to mourn his passing. The world is a better place now because fewer LGBT kids will grow up having to listen to his hate-rhetoric.

  3. Sad to say I agree with what you said! Looking forward to the replacements.

  4. When my family converted to Mormonism in Mexico years and years ago this man became a huge part of my family dynamic--my mother pretty much revered him and read anything he had to say--and of course passed all kinds of literature right along to me--imagine a 12yr old trying to figure out what in the world little factories meant in correlation to how my body and world were changing.

    I don't wish death upon anyone, but I'm happy he didn't make it to be prophet--I know it wouldn't have been a power trip for him, but I found it interesting (if not fascinating) for someone to spend so much time talking about sexual issues of the homosexual kind just to knock it down over and over again--that's all I have to say about that.